SERIES

The Neighborhood The Butlers and the Johnsons (Cedric the Entertainer, Tichina Arnold, Max Greenfield, Beth Behrs) go on a double date and get a big surprise from a soul food restaurant’s chef (Nick George) in this new episode of the comedy. 8 p.m. CBS

The Voice The battle rounds continue with guests Normani, Darius Rucker, Usher and will.i.am. 8 p.m. NBC

All American Spencer (Daniel Ezra) delivers an ultimatum to his father (guest star Chad Coleman) about a new player, but talking to Jordan (Michael Evans Behling) makes him understand what’s really bothering him in this new episode. 8 p.m. CW

Dancing With the Stars The cast of “Dancing With the Stars: Live Tour 2020” performs in this new episode. 8 p.m. ABC

9-1-1 Buck’s (Oliver Stark) lawsuit against the city goes into arbitration, leaving his colleagues feeling betrayed, and Eddie (Ryan Guzman) turns to Lena (guest star Ronda Rousey) for help with his own anger issues in this new episode of the drama. 8 p.m. Fox

Bob Hearts Abishola After Abishola (Folake Olowofoyeku) has a romantic dream about Bob (Billy Gardell), she tries to suppress any feelings she has for him, but that’s not easy. 8:30 p.m. CBS

Rock the Block Home renovators Leanne Ford (“Restored by the Fords”), Mina Starsiak Hawk (“Good Bones”), Jasmine Roth (“Hidden Potential”) and Alison Victoria (“Windy City Rehab”) are each given four weeks and $175,000 for makeovers of four identical properties in the Los Angeles area in this new unscripted competition premiering with two episodes. Drew Scott hosts. 9 and 10 p.m. HGTV

Bluff City Law Sydney and Elijah (Caitlin McGee, Jimmy Smits) help a 12-year-old girl (Priah Ferguson) find justice for the failed levee system that flooded her town in this new episode of the legal drama. Barry Sloane and Michael Luwoye also star. 10 p.m. NBC

The Good Doctor Dr. Andrews (Hill Harper) questions whether Shaun (Freddie Highmore) is really ready for his first surgery in this new episode of the medical drama. 10 p.m. ABC

POV In the new episode “Blowin’ Up,” filmmaker Stephanie Wang-Breal takes her cameras inside the Queens (N.Y.) Human Trafficking Intervention Court, where everyone works toward the common goal of getting at-risk offenders back into a safe, legitimate lifestyle. 10 p.m. KOCE

Catherine the Great Russian Empress Catherine the Great (Helen Mirren) meets the forthright and bold Lieutenant Grigory Potemkin (Jason Clarke) as faces challenges to her throne on all sides in the premiere of this four-part historical drama. 10 p.m. HBO

SPECIALS

The Love of Dogs Benefit Concert From the Country Music Hall of Fame CMA Theater in Nashville, Tenn., Larissa Wohl hosts this musical event aimed at finding permanent homes for millions of shelter and rescue dogs across the United States. Country music stars Lee Brice, Hunter Hayes and Easton Corbin team up for the concert. 10 p.m. Hallmark

MOVIES

The River and the Wall At the U.S.-Mexico border in Texas, conservation filmmaker Ben Masters joins a river guide, an ornithologist and other experts to explore the diverse environments along that border, especially noting the potentially devastating effects President Donald Trump’s border wall would have on this natural setting. 9 p.m. Starz

TALK SHOWS

CBS This Morning Author Newt Gingrich; podcast host Gretchen Rubin (“Happier”). (N) 7 a.m. KCBS

Today (N) 7 a.m. KNBC

KTLA Morning News (N) 7 a.m. KTLA

Good Morning America (N) 7 a.m. KABC

Good Day L.A. Terry Bradshaw. (N) 7 a.m. KTTV

Live With Kelly and Ryan Jimmy Kimmel; Naomie Harris (“Black and Blue”). (N) 9 a.m. KABC

The View Benedict Cumberbatch and Michael Shannon. (N) 10 a.m. KABC

Rachael Ray Jenny Mollen. (N) 10 a.m. KTTV

The Wendy Williams Show (N) 11 a.m. KTTV

The Talk Helen Mirren. (N) 1 p.m. KCBS

The Dr. Oz Show (N) 1 p.m. KTTV

The Kelly Clarkson Show Cedric the Entertainer; stuntwoman Mindy Kelly; Danica Patrick. (N) 2 p.m. KNBC

Dr. Phil A woman says she drinks hard liquor every weekend and smokes marijuana and e-cigarettes every day. (N) 3 p.m. KCBS

The Ellen DeGeneres Show “Momsplaining”; “Let Me in So You Can Win”; “Not Great With Lauren”; Adam Levine prank. (N) 3 p.m. KNBC

The Real Galen Gering (“Days of Our Lives”); Michael Mealor (“The Young and the Restless”). (N) 3 p.m. KTTV

The Doctors (N) 3 p.m. KCOP

To the Contrary With Bonnie Erbé Author Liz Plank (“For the Love of Men”). (N) 6 p.m. KVCR

Amanpour and Company (N) 11 p.m. KCET; midnight KVCR; 1 a.m. KLCS

Conan Rosario Dawson; Dulcé Sloan. (N) 11 p.m. TBS

The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon Scarlett Johansson; Pete Buttigieg; Jim James, Teddy Abrams and the Louisville Orchestra perform. (N) 11:34 p.m. KNBC

The Late Show With Stephen Colbert Julie Andrews; Jonathan Groff; YUNGBLUD and Dan Reynolds. (N) 11:35 p.m. KCBS

Jimmy Kimmel Live! (N) 11:35 p.m. KABC

The Late Late Show With James Corden Paul Rudd; Hasan Minhaj; Anthony Ramos performs. (N) 12:37 a.m. KCBS

Late Night With Seth Meyers Mariska Hargitay; Lizzy Caplan; Sam Fender performs; Terence Higgins performs. (N) 12:37 a.m. KNBC

Nightline (N) 12:37 a.m. KABC

SPORTS

NFL Football The New England Patriots visit the New York Jets, 5 p.m. ESPN

For more sports on TV, see the Sports section.

If you don’t know what the Real ID driver’s license is, you have plenty of company.

If you still don’t know about it by the end of this column, you may be in a world of hurt if you try to get on an airplane starting Oct. 1, 2020.

If you already have your federally compliant driver’s license, you get a gold star. Literally. We’ll explain that in a bit.

If you don’t know whether you have a federally compliant driver’s license, you probably don’t, because you would remember the pain of going to the Department of Motor Vehicles to get one.

If you don’t know why this matters, this is a good time to find out, because the clock is ticking. And you don’t want to be caught in the mass of people pushing and shoving as time draws nigh.

Here’s why I’m nervous about Real ID and you: Almost three-quarters of Americans either don’t have Real ID or don’t know whether they do, according to a study released this month by the U.S. Travel Assn.

If, on Oct. 1, 2020, you are flying domestically and you expect your regular driver’s license to get you through airport security (and you aren’t carrying another form of compliant identification), you will not be able to board your flight.

Getting the federally compliant license requires you to gather your documentation (California drivers can find what’s needed at RealIDdox), make an appointment and go to the DMV. You apply, your documentation checks out and you get a new license with a bear and a gold star in the upper right corner — that’s how you know you have a Real ID.

The travel association study estimates nearly 80,000 of you could be stopped from catching your flights on the first day this is implemented because you don’t have Real ID (or aren’t carrying another form of acceptable identification), resulting in $40.3 million in lost spending for travel businesses. Play that out for a week, and it’s more than half a million people representing $282 million in lost spending.

To bring this home: If you get turned away at the airport and forget to cancel your flight, you can kiss your airline ticket goodbye.

By now you may be sputtering about why you didn’t know about this. It’s not totally your fault. After all, it’s been 14 years since this mandate was signed into law, and there have been numerous delays and false starts in its implementation.

There’s been “an assumption by folks that this would be extended or pushed back, so folks haven’t taken it as seriously as they should,” said Tori Emerson Barnes, executive vice president of public affairs and policy for the U.S. Travel Assn., which is now communicating this information to the public.

How to do that? We spoke with communications experts who suggested that this message to the public requires:

•A sense of urgency. You know how you put off calculating your taxes until April 15? That’s how people look at getting Real ID. You’re not going to jail if you don’t have Real ID (unlike evading your taxes), but you aren’t going to go anywhere on a domestic flight unless you have it (or another acceptable form of ID, see above).

“The TSA and DHS appear to be relying on FAQs at their websites” to communicate this change, said Ethan Rasiel, chief executive of Lightspeed PR, a New York-based public relations firm that helps clients introduce new technologies. “This isn’t going to be sufficient,” he said in an email.

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“To start, they should provide every DMV in the country with clear and concise signage explaining the various types of licenses, and they have to make sure agents are properly aware and trained.

“Just look to the flu shot awareness campaign for an example — it’s almost impossible not to be aware that you need your flu shot.”

•Use every tool in the communications toolbox. “It’s time for a full-court press to get the word out,” said Nico Melendez, formerly a media representative for the Transportation Security Administration. It’s important to use all media — including social media — to let people know, he said.

•Go where travelers are. If you want to let people know about changes, go to travel websites, hotels, travel agents and those who work with business travelers and ask for their help in communicating, said Kevin O’Malley, chairman and chief executive of Travel and Transport, a large corporate travel agency.

•Go where travelers aren’t. This may be the most difficult group to corral, O’Malley said, especially if they are infrequent travelers. It may require a grass-roots effort through banks, institutions that people frequent, clubs, organizations, personnel departments at large companies and so on.

•Reinforcement from voices of authority. Airport TSA officers are telling people who are boarding flights that they need to have a compliant ID, said Jenny Burke, a TSA representative.

•Deemphasize the punitive, said Joshua Dorsey, assistant professor of marketing at Cal State Fullerton. Explain “the benefit to you of why you’d want to have Real ID,” he said. “People do want to travel and want to go places. I can tether the Real ID to something positive that allows me to continue to have a growth experience, I can continue to grow and see other places.”

•Sadvertising. Dorsey was half-joking when he suggested sadvertising, a term with which I wasn’t familiar. “You know those ASPCA ads?” he asked, the ones in which sad-eyed critters need your financial help to avoid terrible fates. I knew immediately and started getting teary-eyed just thinking about them.

You may encounter many of these types of messaging in the coming months (except maybe the sad-eyed cats and dogs). And there’s one more you might consider: word of mouth. Ask your family members. Ask your friends. Because friends and family don’t let their friends and family fly unawares.

Have a travel dilemma, question or problem? Write to [email protected]. We regret we cannot answer every inquiry.

I’ve just endured the world’s newest longest flight, a 10,100-mile nonstop ultra-marathon from New York to Sydney. It took about 19½ hours and was almost as demanding as that sounds.

The record-breaking Qantas Airways flight touched down early Sunday morning in Australia. The Boeing Co. Dreamliner delivered its few dozen passengers — including yours truly — to their destination more or less intact, even if some of us were not quite sure what day it was.

Qantas wants to begin flying the time-saving route commercially as soon as 2022, so the airline used this test trip to explore ways to reduce its inevitable downside: soul-crushing, body-buckling jet lag. Here’s how my journey unfolded in real time.

Off the ground

Our plane has been turned into a flying laboratory. Since the goal is to adapt to our destination’s time zone as fast as possible, we click into the Sydney clock right off the bat. That means no snoozing. The lights stay up and we’re under instructions to stay awake for at least six hours — until it’s evening in Australia.

This immediately causes trouble for some passengers.

Down one side of the business-class section, six Qantas frequent fliers are following a planned schedule for eating and drinking (including limiting alcohol), sleeping and movement. They mostly get with the program, but one of them is dozing within minutes. To be fair, I feel his pain. It may be the middle of the day in Sydney, but my body is telling me it’s pushing midnight back in New York.

Two hours in

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It’s feeding time, and a key moment in the experiment. The specially designed dishes are supposed to fire me up, and a flavorful serving of poached prawns with chili and lime is like a gentle culinary slap in the face. Spicy Chinese-style cod with jasmine rice and sesame seeds repeats the explosive action. I’m momentarily awake.

The plane’s 40 passengers, including media, are all in business class. The six human guinea pigs at the heart of the research are seated on one side of the cabin. I want to do my own set of tests to see how my body is holding up.

After speaking to a travel doctor in Sydney before the trip, I’m armed with equipment to monitor my blood pressure, heart rate and oxygen-saturation levels. I’ve also got a memory test and a mood questionnaire. I want to see if a flight this long impairs my brain or dims my spirits.

The three-hourly tests I take during the first half of the flight reflect the demands of this trip. My blood pressure is elevated, though not high, and my heart rate is picking up. My mood is light, though darkening very gradually.

Three hours in

The physical pressure of this experiment is clear. Around me, passengers are standing up just to stay awake. That dozy frequent flier at the front of the plane is asleep again.

Although I’m finding this regime fairly challenging — and I’m not even in a do-it-tough economy seat — I try to keep things in perspective. After I first wrote about this upcoming flight last week, one reader emailed to urge me into a stouter mindset. During the Korean War in the early 1950s, he said, he regularly flew 40-hour reconnaissance missions with crew rotations every six hours. “Man up,” the 83-year-old told me. Point taken.

Four hours in

Marie Carroll, a professor at the University of Sydney who’s overseeing the passenger research on the flight, rallies her troops at the back of the plane. “This is the time, guys, when we really have to work through this,” she tells them. Moments later, they’re leaning against the food trolleys in the galley, stretching. Next, they perform upright press-ups among the empty economy sets. As a finale, they attempt synchronized dance moves in the aisles. All in the name of science.

It looks like cabaret, but beating jet lag is serious business. Beyond the sleepless nights and daytime fatigue, experts say critical processes including heart function and metabolism are upset when the body clock gets disrupted.

Seven hours in

A second meal arrives, and not a moment too soon. It’s heavy on carbohydrates and designed to send us to sleep. The sweet potato soup with creme fraiche is thick and luxurious, the toasted cheese sandwich less so. The chef on the plane tells me he’s been preparing our meals for three days.

The lights are dimmed at last, and it feels like I’ve been released. I crash for six hours straight. That’s longer than I can remember sleeping without waking on any other flight, even with the business-class privilege of a flat bed.

Fourteen hours in

Across the board, my own medical tests suggest I’m coping. My blood pressure, which the doctor in Sydney said would be a good gauge of stress and fatigue, is back to normal. My heart’s pumping slower, I ace my memory test, and my questionnaire shows my mood is brighter.

The research on the passengers and crew will feed into Project Sunrise, Qantas’ plan to start direct commercial services connecting Sydney with New York and London. Other super-long flights from Australia’s eastern seaboard to South America and Africa might follow, Qantas says.

On board, Chief Executive Officer Alan Joyce tells me he’ll “absolutely” roll out this flight’s regime on his other long routes — if the science shows it helps. The trick is accommodating those who want to drink and snooze at will, Joyce says.

But don’t go booking your round-the-world flights just yet. Qantas needs new planes from Boeing or Airbus SE that can do the job with a full load of passengers, and a new deal with crew to work longer than 20 hours. “It needs everything to come together,” Joyce says. He initially had dreams of turning these super-long flights into flying hotels, with sleeping berths or a work-out zone. That vision gave way to reality when profit margins proved too tight to waste space on such luxuries.

Our plane doesn’t have the range to haul a full load of passengers with luggage to Sydney. It took off with its fuel tanks maxed out — about 101 tons. To keep the weight down, there’s no cargo, and food and drink are limited. In New York, the captain had seemed confident we’d make it to Sydney with gas to spare. He planned on landing with 6 tons of fuel, enough to stay airborne for another 90 minutes.

Seventeen hours in

Breakfast time, and there’s no limp sausage. Instead, it’s a bowl of ancient grains, avocado puree, warm haloumi cheese and an herb salad. This flight is turning everything on its head.

One of the frequent fliers, Sydney-based investor Nick Mole, says he got almost eight hours’ sleep and feels good. What about a full day’s work after landing? “I probably could do that,” he says. He thinks the bigger test will be how he copes in a couple of days.

Preparing to land

I feel better now than I did after flying to New York from Sydney a few days ago with one stop. That trip included a grating hour and a half queuing at immigration in Los Angeles with hundreds of other zombified travelers.

Personally, I would choose a direct Sydney-New York flight over one with a layover. But it won’t suit everyone: It took discipline and work to stick to the no-sleep routine in the first half of this flight. There may be a benefit to switching to the destination time immediately, but it comes at a price. I feel like I had to earn it.

Angus Whitley writes for Bloomberg.

The epiphany came when a certain coffee chain started replacing plastic straws with paper ones. Despite increasingly dire warnings about Texas-size islands of plastic in the world’s oceans, the sudden public debate over straws was arguably a turning point in how American consumers think about sustainability.

On one hand, the rise of paper straws is a brazen case of greenwashing, since straws make up only a tiny share of waste. On the other, the proliferation of paper and bamboo straws marked the beginning of a larger commercial pivot away from plastic.

Companies are beginning to realize there’s more to lose from offending consumers who are aware of how cheap plastic products feed global warming, choke oceans, kill wildlife and — more slowly — threaten us. This is especially the case when it comes to packaging.

Containers, cartons, wrapping and everything else discarded after a product is used make up about 30% of all American trash, or more than 76 million tons annually. Now the biggest retailers and consumer goods giants are racing to replace everything from plastic envelopes to styrofoam meat trays with fiber-based iterations.

The U.S. paper recycling industry, it turns out, has suddenly found itself in demand — and maybe just in the nick of time.

Until 2018, recycling in America — from plastics to paper to assorted waste — was propped up by China’s willingness to purchase much of it, ostensibly for recycling and reuse by its domestic industries. Instead of returning to China empty, shipping containers were filled with refuse, bales of plastic bottles, cardboard and wastepaper.

But when Beijing decided it didn’t want the world’s garbage anymore, slashing the amount it would take while requiring the rest to be near-pristine, the value of American recyclables plummeted.

With an excess supply and no one to sell it to, prices for recycled residential paper even touched negative territory. That means cities have to pay someone to take away the material they collect. The S&P 500 Paper Packaging Index has dropped more than 25% since China started restricting trash.

For U.S. towns and cities, with their colorful recycling barrels and bins, what was at best a break-even proposition suddenly became very expensive. Unable to sell recycling at a high enough price, they either had to raise taxes to pay for collection, dump it all into landfills or burn it. Many chose the latter options.

Renee Yardley, a senior vice president at recycling company Sustana Group, said 2019 has been “a challenging year” for municipalities that collect paper.

But consumer goods companies might be starting to turn that around.

Trying to get ahead of regulations in countries that ban or tax plastic packaging, some product manufacturers are turning to recycled paper for the first time. With restrictions on single-use plastics in place across 60 nations and 350 U.S. municipalities, analysts on MSCI’s environmental, social and governance research team said plastics “could lose market share to alternatives.”

More than 200 businesses, representing about 20% of all packaging used globally, have made commitments to reduce plastic waste, according to the Ellen MacArthur Foundation. Coca-Cola European Partners became the latest to do so, saying it will replace plastic shrink wrap with cardboard for its multipacks across Western Europe, removing about 4,000 tons of plastic annually.

A ton of recycled paper saves the equivalent of 17 trees, more than 16,000 gallons of water and 5,500 pounds of carbon dioxide, according to Sustana. Americans are also more likely to recycle paper; collection rates for paper are above 60%, compared with 30% for common types of plastic.

But it’s expensive to recycle paper: The process begins with fleets of trucks to pick it up and facilities to clean it, pulp it and eventually turn it into rolls of recycled paper. Then it’s sold to manufacturers for use in their products or packaging.

Now, with a potential change in fortunes in sight, the U.S. recycling sector faces another challenge: a need for expanded infrastructure. Moreover, while the low price of discarded paper makes it cheaper for consumer companies to use it in their products, it’s also attracting the attention of European recycling executives.

One of them is Miles Roberts, chief executive of DS Smith, Europe’s largest cardboard-packaging recycler. He’s betting big on the U.S.

DS Smith plans to open a packaging plant in Indiana and a recycling depot in Pennsylvania later this year. Roberts said a key draw of the American market is that the price of recycled paper has become competitive with that of paper made directly from trees.

“It just takes a few years to get the investment in infrastructure going,” Roberts said. “We’re really just at the start.”

London-based DS Smith’s customers include consumer giants such as Mondelez, Nestle, P&G, Danone and Unilever. They have been pushing the company to create the same types of cardboard packaging in the U.S. for their products. (Think TV dinner trays made from paper and paper alternatives to plastic bubble wrap.)

Over the past year, Austrian packaging company Mondi Ltd. rolled out paper-based packaging for everything from deli cheese and premium watermelons to wine glasses. The company notes, though, that plastic packaging will still be needed in the medical and food industries, where other materials would be unsafe or impractical.

Indeed, Mondi’s more deliberate approach is more likely to be the rule than the exception; the company said its strategy is to use “paper where possible, plastic when useful.”

It also bears noting that not all recycled paper products are as biodegradable as advertised: Some are coated in plastic or contain chemicals.

Still, the demand for recycled paper products in America is rising, according to Pat Lindner. The new president of consumer packaging at Atlanta-based WestRock Co., Lindner contends that “retailers are now saying, ‘We need solutions for this, and we need it now.’”

He joined the company in March, taking over a multibillion-dollar business after spending two decades in the plastics industry. WestRock has gone from working on a handful of new packaging projects to hundreds in the past year, he said. It’s replaced plastic wrapping for beer cans with printable paper labels suitable for advertising, and is substituting paper for plastic lipstick and deodorant containers, as well as envelopes, e-commerce packaging and the dreaded styrofoam meat tray.

That last item has been reborn in a new pressed-fiber version that’s fully compostable.

Ecologic, which makes molded paper bottles out of old corrugated cardboard boxes, said it’s seeing growing demand as well. The Manteca, Calif.-based company said it’s sold 10 million paper bottles since it opened in 2011, but expects to sell as many as 6 million next year alone.

“We’re a little bit more expensive than plastic, but there’s a desperation right now at so many levels to start looking at alternatives,” founder Julie Corbett said. The company makes paper bottles for use with laundry detergent sold under Unilever’s Seventh Generation brand, and the Seed personal care line made by L’Oreal.

To compete with plastic on price, Ecologic has been automating every step of its manufacturing process, and collecting cardboard waste from L’Oreal’s distribution center in Los Angeles for reuse in its bottles. Corbett said she expects demand for paper packaging to grow as consumer product giants shift household products back to powders, which also save water. The pricing gap between plastic and paper bottles should close as they scale up production, she said. “The packaging industry has for years focused on cheaper, faster and less, but it’s utterly disconnected from the consumer,” Corbett said. “Paper isn’t complicated; that’s why it’s so beautiful. It dissolves.”

Still, to be recycled, wastepaper needs to be clean. Pizza boxes stained with grease, for example, won’t cut it. Until recently, neither would paper products coated in plastic. WestRock has been trying to change this, Lindner said, modifying its recycling facilities so machines can process coated paper products such as coffee cups.

“Sometimes a paper solution is going to be more expensive,” Lindner said, but brands don’t seem to mind, he added, given that more consumers are demanding environmentally sensitive substitutes for plastic.

In Europe, paper can “close the loop” in just 14 days, going from one product into another. European cardboard is typically 30% to 40% lighter than that made in the U.S., and uses significantly less virgin material, DS Smith’s Roberts said. As the company’s Indiana plant begins operations, he noted that lighter boxes are a big attraction for U.S. companies, especially since they can reduce shipping costs.

Yardley of Sustana agreed that active demand from U.S. consumer companies is helping prop up the recycling industry. “Customers are coming to us and making us think about it differently,” she said.

Sustana has worked with Seattle-based Starbucks to test how it could manufacture coffee cups from recycled coffee cups while making its recycled pulp compliant with Food and Drug Administration food-safety rules. The goal, she said, is to make more recycled packaging and containers that can be used with food, without the need for a barrier or coating.

Roberts said his company aims to use techniques refined in Europe to replace plastic with fully recyclable material.

“The U.S. is a massive, growing and fast-moving market for paper fiber,” he said.

Dating was one of my weakest strengths. You name it, I would try it. Match.com. OKCupid. Grindr. Jack’d.

I also met plenty of men organically, starting with Nick. We saw each other from across the room at the Rockwell in Los Feliz. No doubt there was an immediate connection — we were having major eye sex. Finally, he introduced himself. We talked all night and exchanged phone numbers, and I drove him back to his car. And I had my first ever kiss, with him. I was over the moon. I met a man that I liked.

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The next day, I called my closest friends and told them the news. I even called my aunt, whom I’m close to. After four dates with Nick, we added each other on Facebook. (It’s official when you’re Facebook friends, right? Not yet “In a Relationship” close, but close enough to get to that next level.)

Then Nick took a trip to Canada and when he returned I noticed a change immediately. He wasn’t texting me as much. Right before Christmas, he called and said he wanted to see me, and talk. I knew this was not good.

He came over and told me he was having second thoughts about us. And then he left, just like that. I cried. I was embarrassed and devastated. (I had ordered him a custom photo album, engraved with his name, as a holiday gift. He was obsessed with photos of his car collection, so I thought this would be the perfect gift.)

I had never experienced what a real breakup felt like before. I called my closest friends and aunt, in tears.

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After Nick came Michael. I was at a holiday party with one of my friends, who invited me as a way to cheer me up after the breakup. During some down time at the party, I turned to the Grindr app to browse for a few minutes and up came a message from a handsome man close to my age.

Michael and I exchanged several text messages and photos — not X-rated! I thought to myself, “Nick who?” Later, we had our first date. He picked me up at my home in Pasadena and we dined at Settebello Pizzeria Napoletana restaurant near Old Town. I felt very timid, sitting in front of a man who I thought was too good-looking to be with someone like me.

Michael acted like a true gentleman, though. Immediately responded to my text messages. Every time we went out, he always made me feel like I was the only person in the room. He always had flowers for me.

But then came another noticeable change in communication. Actually, he just disappeared. No response to calls or texts, no nothing. He wasn’t on social media, either, so I had no way to stalk him there to find out what happened. (I later found out he was in a relationship. Yep, I was the guy on the side.)

Once again, I was stuck explaining to my close friends and aunt that I was played. Embarrassing.

Next, I met Brandon, on OKCupid. He was an avid hiker and meditator and lived near wine country. He was recently divorced from a woman and had two daughters. In our first phone conversation, we chatted for hours. I immediately felt a connection. And yes, I gave my friends and aunt the “OMG I met a guy” speech. Again.

For our first date, Brandon — who had his own plane — flew down to see me. We walked around Echo Park Lake, paddle boated. Brandon was newly out and had never been with a guy before, so it was all new territory for him. The following morning, I drove him back to the airport for his flight home. (Yes, he spent the night at my house!)

The following week? Brandon called to say he wanted to “explore” being gay and see what’s out there before settling down.

Great. Another failed romance. I’d even posted a photo of us on Echo Park Lake. So I had to take that down and explain to everyone once again that it was all over.

I did have to thank Brandon, though, for introducing me to meditating. Which I now do almost every day. After Brandon, I decided I needed to go on a spiritual journey of sorts.

I was insecure and feeling unworthy after all of these failed relationships that marked my 20s. I went on a summer trip to Greece, where I did a lot of meditating and reflecting. Somewhere between Santorini and Mykonos, I came to the realization that I should pause the dating for a bit. And that I should stop telling everyone my personal business, and keep it all to myself.

The more I shared, the more follow-up questions I got, and the more pressure I felt to make a relationship “work.” I despised these follow-ups more than the actual breakups in some cases. And let’s face it, most relationships fail.

I saw a quote on Instagram that summed it up: “Things to keep private: your income, your love life and your next move.”

I intuitively understood this on some level. I kept my income private. And certainly my next move in my professional life. But I’d never learned to keep my love life private.

It was time to self-reflect and self-correct.

###

A few months later, I was keeping my focus on my design projects, and some upcoming travel to Mexico and Asia. And I definitely wasn’t dating. But I still had the OKCupid app installed on my smartphone. And up popped a message from a guy named Lucas. I waited a few days before responding. Lucas was handsome, but I was so over dating at that point that I just kept it to some light conversation.

After I returned from Mexico, Lucas asked me for my cell number. We started texting. As we got to know each other better, we made plans to meet in person at L.A. Live for dinner and drinks. But I forced myself to Slow. It. Down. and not get too attached.

So, I played it casual and dropped all the expectations that I had carried into previous relationships.

And, this time, I said not a word to anyone.

Soon, I was heading back out of town again, this time for a month traveling all over Asia. I figured Lucas would be long gone before I returned.

But while I was in Asia, Lucas regularly messaged me to see how I was doing, and how my trip was going. He wanted to see photos from my sightseeing.

And when I returned, he asked when he could see me again. He knew I enjoyed hiking, so he suggested we go on a hike on the Palos Verdes Peninsula. I still hadn’t told anyone about Lucas, not even my best friend. Not even my aunt.

In fact, I waited until after our 10th date before telling anyone about him. By keeping it under wraps, I was able to just date Lucas and focus on getting to know him. No outside distractions. Just him and me.

It’s been over a year and a half that we’ve been together. I’m so grateful for the moments I’ve had with him and his wonderful 11-year-old daughter. I couldn’t ask for anything better. It’s something I just never imagined would happen for me.

He was a secret worth keeping.

The author is an interior designer and is on Instagram @ruben_marquez

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KABUL, Afghanistan — 

While President Trump insists he’s bringing home Americans from “endless wars” in the Mideast, his Pentagon chief says all U.S. troops leaving Syria will go to western Iraq and the American military will continue operations against the Islamic State group.

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They aren’t coming home and the United States isn’t leaving the turbulent Middle East, according to current plans outlined by U.S. Defense Secretary Mark Esper before he arrived in Afghanistan on Sunday. The fight in Syria against IS, once spearheaded by American allied Syrian Kurds who have been cast aside by Trump, will be undertaken by U.S. forces, possibly from neighboring Iraq.

Esper did not rule out the idea that U.S. forces would conduct counterterrorism missions from Iraq into Syria. But he told reporters traveling with him that those details will be worked out over time.

Trump nonetheless tweeted: “USA soldiers are not in combat or ceasefire zones. We have secured the Oil. Bringing soldiers home!”

The president declared this past week that Washington had no stake in defending the Kurdish fighters who died by the thousands as America’s partners fighting in Syria against IS extremists. Turkey conducted a weeklong offensive into northeastern Syria against the Kurdish fighters before a military pause.

“It’s time for us to come home,” Trump said, defending his removal of U.S. troops from that part of Syria and praising his decision to send more troops and military equipment to Saudi Arabia to help the kingdom defend against Iran.

Esper’s comments to reporters traveling with him were the first to specifically lay out where American troops will go as they shift from Syria and what the counter-IS fight could look like. Esper said he has spoken to his Iraqi counterpart about the plan to shift about 1,000 troops from Syria into western Iraq.

Trump’s top aide, asked about the fact that the troops were not coming home as the president claimed they would, said, “Well, they will eventually.”

Acting chief of staff Mick Mulvaney told “Fox News Sunday” that “the quickest way to get them out of danger was to get them into Iraq.”

As Esper left Washington on Saturday, U.S. troops were continuing to pull out of northern Syria after Turkey’s invasion into the border region. Reports of sporadic clashes continued between Turkish-backed fighters and the Syria Kurdish forces despite a five-day cease-fire agreement hammered out Thursday between U.S. and Turkish leaders.

The Turkish military’s death toll has risen to seven soldiers since it launched its offensive on Oct. 9.

Trump ordered the bulk of the approximately 1,000 U.S. troops in Syria to withdraw after Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan made it clear in a phone call that his forces were about to invade Syria to push back Kurdish forces that Turkey considers terrorists.

The pullout largely abandons America’s Kurdish allies who have fought IS alongside U.S. troops for several years. Between 200 and 300 U.S. troops will remain at the southern Syrian outpost of Al-Tanf.

Esper said the troops going into Iraq will have two missions.

“One is to help defend Iraq and two is to perform a counter-ISIS mission as we sort through the next steps,” he said. “Things could change between now and whenever we complete the withdrawal, but that’s the game plan right now.”

The U.S. currently has more than 5,000 American forces in Iraq, under an agreement between the two countries. The U.S. pulled its troops out of Iraq in 2011 when combat operations there ended, but they went back in after IS began to take over large swaths of the country in 2014. The number of American forces in Iraq has remained small due to political sensitivities in the country, after years of what some Iraqis consider U.S. occupation during the war that began in 2003.

Esper said he will talk with other allies at a NATO meeting in the coming week to discuss the way ahead for the counter-IS mission.

Asked if U.S. special operations forces will conduct unilateral military operations into Syria to go after IS, Esper said that is an option that will be discussed with allies over time.

He said one of his top concerns is what the next phase of the counter-IS missions looks like, “but we have to work through those details.” He said that if U.S. forces do go in, they would be protected by American aircraft.

While he acknowledged reports of intermittent fighting despite the cease-fire agreement, he said that overall it “generally seems to be holding. We see a stability of the lines, if you will, on the ground.”

He also said that, so far, the Syrian Democratic Forces that partnered with the U.S. to fight IS have maintained control of the prisons in Syria where they are still present. The Turks, he said, have indicated they have control of the IS prisons in their areas.

“I can’t assess whether that’s true or not without having people on the ground,” said Esper.

He added that the U.S. withdrawal will be deliberate and safe, and it will take “weeks not days.”

According to a U.S. official, about a couple hundred troops have left Syria so far. The U.S. forces have been largely consolidated in one location in the west and a few locations in the east.

The official, who spoke on condition of anonymity to discuss ongoing operations, said the U.S. military is not closely monitoring the effectiveness of the cease-fire, but is aware of sporadic fighting and violations of the agreement. The official said it will still take a couple of weeks to get forces out of Syria.

Also Sunday, U.S. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi led a group of American lawmakers on a visit to Jordan to discuss “the deepening crisis” in Syria.

Jordan’s state news agency Petra said that King Abdullah II, in a meeting with the Americans, stressed the importance of safeguarding Syria’s territorial integrity and guarantees for the “safe and voluntary” return of refugees.

WASHINGTON — 

The Trump administration is planning to collect DNA samples from asylum-seekers and other migrants detained by immigration officials and will add the information to a massive FBI database used by law enforcement hunting for criminals, a Justice Department official said.

The Justice Department will publish an amended regulation Monday that would mandate DNA collection for almost all migrants who cross between official entry points and are held even temporarily, according to the official. The official spoke to the Associated Press on condition of anonymity because the regulation had not yet been published.

The rule does not apply to legal permanent residents, or anyone entering the U.S. legally. Children younger than 14 are exempt. It’s not clear yet whether asylum-seekers who come through official crossings will be exempt.

Homeland Security officials gave a broad outline of the plan to expand DNA collection at the border two weeks ago, but it was not clear then whether asylum-seekers would be included, or when it would begin.

The new policy would allow the government to amass a trove of biometric data on hundreds of thousands of migrants, raising major privacy concerns and questions about whether such data should be compelled even when a person is not suspected of a crime other than crossing the border illegally. Civil rights groups already have expressed concerns that data could be misused, and the new policy is likely to lead to legal action.

Justice officials hope to have a pilot program in place shortly after the 20-day comment period ends and expand from there, the official said. The new regulations are effective Monday, after the regulation is published.

Trump administration officials say they hope to solve more crimes committed by immigrants through the increased collection of DNA from a group that can often slip through the cracks. The Justice official also said it would be a deterrent — the latest step aimed at discouraging migrants from trying to enter the United States between official crossings by adding hurdles to the immigration process.

Currently, officials collect DNA on a much more limited basis — when a migrant is prosecuted in federal court for a criminal offense. That includes illegal crossing, a charge that has affected mostly single adults. Those accompanied by children generally aren’t prosecuted because children can’t be detained.

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President Trump and others in his administration often single out crimes committed by immigrants as a reason for stricter border control. But multiple studies have found that people here illegally are less likely to commit crime than U.S. citizens, and legal immigrants are even less likely to do so.

For example, a study last year in the journal Criminology found that from 1990 through 2014, states with bigger shares of migrants have lower crime rates.

Immigrant rights advocates were immediately critical following initial disclosure of the DNA collection plans two weeks ago.

“That could really change the purpose of DNA collection from one of criminal investigation to population surveillance,” American Civil Liberties Union attorney Vera Eidleman said then.

Curbing immigration is Trump’s signature issue, but his administration has struggled in dealing with the surge of people trying to enter the United States, mostly Central American families fleeing poverty and violence.

Authorities made more than 810,000 arrests at the border during the budget year that just ended in September — a high not seen for more than 10 years. Officials say numbers have since fallen following crackdowns, changes in asylum regulations and agreements with Central American countries, but they remain higher than in previous years.

DNA profile collection is allowed under a law expanded in 2009 to require that any adult arrested for a federal crime provide a DNA sample. At least 23 states require DNA testing, but some occur after a suspect is convicted of a crime.

The FBI database, known as the Combined DNA Index System, has nearly 14 million convicted offender profiles, plus 3.6 million arrestee profiles, and 966,782 forensic profiles as of August 2019. The profiles in the database do not contain names or other personal identifiers to protect privacy; only an agency identifier, specimen identification number and DNA lab associated with the analysis. That way, when people aren’t a match, their identification isn’t exposed.

The only way to get a profile out of the system is to request through an attorney that it be removed.

Federal and state investigators use the system to match DNA in crimes they are trying to solve. As of August 2019, the database produced 479,847 hits, or matches with law enforcement seeking crime scene data, and assisted in more than 469,534 investigations.

Justice Department officials are striking a line in the regulation that gave the secretary of Homeland Security discretion to opt out of collecting DNA from immigrants because of resource limitations or operational hurdles.

Justice and Homeland Security officials are still working out details, but cheek swab kits would be provided by the FBI, the official said. The FBI will help train border officials on how to get a sample, which shouldn’t take more than a few minutes.

Customs and Border Protection already collects fingerprints on everyone over 14 in its custody.

The new regulations will apply to adults who cross the border illegally and are briefly detained by Customs and Border Protection, or for a longer period by Immigration and Customs Enforcement.

Those who come to official crossings and are considered inadmissible and not further detained will be exempt. Other exceptions are being worked out, the official said.

More than 51,000 detainees are in ICE custody. Border Patrol custody fluctuates its facilities only hold migrants until they are processed and either released or sent to ICE custody. At the height, more than 19,000 people were held. Recently it was down to fewer than 4,000.

LONDON — 

WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange appeared in court Monday to fight extradition to the United States on charges of conspiring to hack into a Pentagon computer, with his legal team saying it needs more time to prepare its case.

Assange raised a fist in a defiant gesture to acknowledge his supporters in the gallery at Westminster Magistrates’ Court for a case management hearing. He was clean shaven and wearing a blue sweater and sports jacket. He read his name to the court when asked and gave his date of birth.

Former Home Secretary Sajid Javid signed an order in June allowing Assange to be extradited. U.S. authorities accuse Assange of scheming with former Army intelligence analyst Chelsea Manning to break a password for a classified government computer. The case is expected to take months to resolve, with each side able to make several appeals of rulings.

Assange’s legal team is seeking to delay his full extradition hearing which is now set for five days in February.

Lawyer Mark Summers, representing Assange, says more time is needed to prepare Assange’s defense against “unprecedented” use of espionage charges against a journalist. Summers said the case has many facets and will require a “mammoth” amount of planning and preparation.

He also accused the U.S. of illegally spying on Assange while he was inside the Ecuadorian Embassy seeking refuge.

“We need more time,” Summers said, asking for a three-month delay.

Representing the U.S., lawyer James Lewis said the U.S. would oppose any delay to the proceeding.

The case is expected to take months to resolve, with each side able to make several appeals of rulings.

The public gallery was jammed with Assange supporters, including former London Mayor Ken Livingstone, and outside the courthouse others carried placards calling for Assange to be released.

Assange has been in Belmarsh Prison on the outskirts of London while the extradition case is being prepared. He is facing a number of serious charges including espionage.

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Assange claims he is a journalist entitled to First Amendment protection.

LONDON — 

British Prime Minister Boris Johnson was expected to push for a vote on his European Union divorce deal on Monday, as Parliament geared up for a week of guerrilla warfare over Brexit.

With just 10 days to go until the U.K. is due to leave the bloc on Oct. 31, Johnson’s government planned to ask for a “straight up-and-down vote” on the EU divorce agreement. That request comes two days after lawmakers voted to delay approving the deal.

But House of Commons Speaker John Bercow could refuse to allow such a vote because parliamentary rules generally bar the same measure from being considered a second time during the same session of Parliament unless something has changed.

Johnson’s Conservative government will also introduce the legislation necessary to implement the Brexit agreement it struck with the EU last week, opening the door to potentially lengthy debates or amendments that could scuttle the deal.

With the Brexit deadline looming and British politicians still squabbling over the country’s departure terms from the bloc, Johnson has been forced to ask the EU for a three-month delay to the departure date.

He did that, grudgingly, to comply with a law passed by Parliament ordering the government to postpone Brexit rather than risk the economic damage that could come from a no-deal exit.

But Johnson accompanied the letter to the EU, sent late Saturday, with a second note saying that he personally opposed delaying the U.K.’s Oct. 31 exit.

European Council President Donald Tusk said he would consult EU leaders on how to respond to the request. The other 27 EU members are weary of the long-running Brexit saga, but also want to avoid a no-deal British exit, which would damage economies on both sides of the Channel.

Germany’s economy minister suggested it could be a few days before the EU decided to respond to the Brexit delay request.

“We will have somewhat more clarity in the coming days, and we will then exercise our responsibility and quickly make a decision,” Germany’s Peter Altmaier said.

He told Deutschlandfunk radio that he wouldn’t have a problem with an extension by “a few days or a few weeks” if that rules out a no-deal Brexit.

But French President Emmanuel Macron, who had a phone call with Johnson over the weekend, called for a quick clarification of the U.K.’s position. In a statement, he said a delay “would not be in any party’s interest.”

France’s junior minister for European affairs, Amelie de Montchalin, told French news broadcaster BFM TV there would have to be a reason for the delay, like a parliamentary election in Britain or a new British referendum on Brexit.

The British government still hopes it can pass the needed Brexit legislation by the end of the month so the U.K. can leave on time.

But it suffered a setback on Saturday — Parliament’s first weekend sitting since the Falklands War of 1982 — when British lawmakers voted to make support for the Brexit deal conditional on passage of the legislation to implement it, something that could take several days or weeks.

That also gives lawmakers another chance to scrutinize — and possibly change— the Brexit departure terms while the bill is still in Parliament.

Vogue

In 2019, Australia celebrates its 60th birthday, marking six decades since the fashion title launched in Australia. As part of the magazine’s birthday celebrations, a collaboration was born between Australia and the National Portrait Gallery in Canberra, to launch a retrospective exhibition that celebrates our rich history. Titled , the exhibition presents the best, the boldest and the most beautiful photography from the fashion magazine’s archives. The exhibit is presented as a three-part narrative – Looking Back, Looking Out and Looking Forward – which means we’ve not only been delving into our history but also examining our present, as well as what Australia should look like in the future. It’s this process that has allowed us to reflect on some of the most iconic fashion moments over the decades and we’ve been able to track how the magazine has evolved over its 60-year history by looking at the changing nature of the cover.

The very first issue of Australia (above) came out in the 1950s and was a spring/summer issue released in 1959, with the cover photographed by Norman Parkinson. This very special cover is featured among the selection of vintage Australia covers not only presented in the exhibition, but also below. In the 60s and 70s, esteemed photographers such as Irving Penn, Helmut Newton, Henry Talbot and Lord Snowden captured the magazine’s covers, with the identities of many cover stars unknown. As we move into the 1980s, 1990s and early 2000s, you will see that our cover stars are often recognisable faces, right up to our September 2019 issue, starring Australian Hollywood actor Margot Robbie. Nowadays, the images presented by leading fashion photographers, including Nicole Bentley and Charlie Dennington, present a cross-section between the fashion model and the celebrity, with the likes of Akiima Ajak, Adut Akech, Charlee Fraser, Fernanda Ly and Andreja Pejić embodying the diversity the magazine represents in the 21st century.

We commence by looking at iconic covers from the magazine’s first decade, 1959 to 1969, before moving into the second decade, 1969 to 1979. Scroll on to see them all.

Check back next week as we delve into the 1980s.

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